All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
