All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
he's single and there are thong briefs.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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