How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
