This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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