you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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