it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
