Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize