I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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