every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
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