I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
