Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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