just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize