Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
