It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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