The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
