dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
