Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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