he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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