Hey man sorry I got all grabby
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
