why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
