If i come over, it means nothing
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
