I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize