Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
