So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
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But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
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You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
There are leaves in my underwear?
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