He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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