She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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