So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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