I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
