We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
