I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
