I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I need a burrito and a hug.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
