i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
This gyro tastes like lonliness
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
My penis needs a shock collar
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
