the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
