By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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