Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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