how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
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