Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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