what if every blade of grass was a penis?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
