i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize
