got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I am one with the molecules
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.