evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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