I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
