it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize