Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
