chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
