it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
