I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
