I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize