Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
