He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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