I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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